The ring goes on your finger, your eyes fill with tears and the two of share a beautiful moment together as you mark the beginning of the next step in your lives. OK, that moment is passed and now it’s time to get your planning on.
#5 – Like a Game Show, Know Your Stuff
When we started inquiring about locations, we’d call or send venues casual (and excited e-mails) that said, “Hi! We are interested in having our wedding at ________ sometime in September. Would you mind sending pricing and information?” The responses were always the same; “What in your wedding date? Will you be having your ceremony on-site? How many people? What time?” Woah! I have no idea! First of all, I always thought you chose a month or season when you wanted to get married and your date depended on when the venue was available in that time period. Apparently, many couples have a specific date in mind ahead of time. Who knew?
Tip: Prior to visiting or contacting venues, talk with your fiancé and make a preliminary guestimate on head count, date etc. It will help speed up the process and get you more precise information.
#4 – Create Pinterest Limits
I can’t tell you how many times I hear people say, “I can’t imagine what planning would have been like if Pinterest was around when I was getting married.” Well, they don’t realize that, when it comes to weddings, Pinterest is a blessing and a curse. Yes, you’ll browse hundreds of amazing images and ideas but think about what that does to decision-making. Every time I think, “this is what I want,” I see a pin that makes me second-guess my decision. I am currently stuck between rustic/bohemian and vintage/romantic décor themes. It’s too hard to decide!
Tip: Give yourself Pinterest limits. If you’re recently engaged and haven’t really started planning then browse away! However, if you’ve already started planning don’t go crazy by over-immersing yourself in ideas. Login from time-to-time to see fresh visuals but that’s it!
#3 – The “W” in Wedding Doesn’t Stand for Woman
I met up with a friend and her fiancé last year, just as they had started making their initial wedding plans. As we chatted and I asked questions it was clear that her fiancé didn’t know any of the answers. In fact he had a surprised look on his face after everything she said. When I ran into her one month before the wedding she was running around finalizing everything and he was playing golf. She had a breakdown in the middle of Shop Rite. P.S. The fella referenced in this story is not a jerk. The bride never asked him to help, so he assumed she wanted to plan everything by herself.
Tip: It’s completely understandable and fine if the bride wants to plan the wedding alone, but that doesn’t mean she needs to be alone while she plans the wedding! If the groom isn’t opinionated about center-pieces or doesn’t really care about invitations, that’s fine. However, don’t miss out on spending time together in the process.
#2 – “Don’t Worry so Much About Supposed to.”
Have you ever seen the film, Chocolat? I love this quote and it is a useful thing to remember when wedding planning. These days couples are making new traditions. Think you need to have a sit-down dinner even though you want to throw a cocktail party? Think again!
Tip: As the quote says, don’t worry so much. There are no rules or “supposed to’s” anymore!
#1 – Repeat After Me, “It’s One Day”
Weddings can not only be expensive, but they can stressful. It’s a day that you think about forever and then all of a sudden it’s here. This concept causes a lot of pressure, especially for the bride, to create perfection. You’ll feel like you need to be in the best shape and look the prettiest, that the food, décor and music need to be spot-on and that if it rains or snows the world is over.
Tip: It is (almost) exactly 6 months to my wedding day. A few months ago I had an epiphany; I am about to marry the man of my dreams and it doesn’t matter what shape I’m in, whether the food at the reception is soggy or if there is torrential downpour.